In another article (here), I discussed the romance of God, and how God delighted my heart with a romance that He had written – the one between each of us and Himself. But I think the story would be incomplete if I stopped there.
You see, my life from that moment wasn’t like the fairytales in the movies. It didn’t just stop after romance was found, ended with “They Lived Happily Ever After” and the credits rolled.
When I found that romance, my life was just beginning.
If you haven’t read “The Romance of God”, the synopsis is this: I gave up dating for a year in hopes that God would bring the perfect man into my life. In reality, He ended up showing me that His romance was far beyond anything I had ever dreamed, and He could fill every void in my life I thought needed to be filled by a marriage and five kids.
After that year, my whole perspective on dating changed.
You see, when God is filling you up with the romance you desire, you stop seeking it from others and instead look to give it to others.
I dated one man after that year of fasting, and because God had changed my heart and was alive in this man’s heart as well, it was the best relationship I have ever experienced.
I didn’t try to manipulate the relationship to my advantage; rather, I worked hard to guard both of our hearts to better prepare us for the future. Our relationship wasn’t filled with constant make-out sessions. It was filled with prayer, with Bible study, and with serving others. All because we both loved God more than each other and more than ourselves.
I heard a pastor say something once that spoke this truth so clearly and intentionally.
In John 14, Jesus is quoted over and over again saying something along the lines of, “If you love me, you will obey my commandments.”
Throughout my life, I was taught to read those passages as “Obey my commandments to prove that you love me.”
And then this pastor said one sentence that changed my life. He said, “Flip the verse around.”
Rather than emphasizing the point of keeping the commandments, emphasize the point of loving God. In other words, if you love God, following His commandments will be automatic.
How true is that?? I have found over and over in my life that when I am truly pursuing God and allowing Him to pursue me, following His commandments is easy, because everything this world has to offer is nothing compared to how awesome He is!
Love God, and His Word will become a part of you. It won’t be anything you work to do. You will be chasing so hard after God, everything of the world will simply rush right by you, taking not even a glimpse of your time.
When I actively sought out God and began loving Him more fully, my yearning for sexual intimacy outside of marriage dwindled. My longing for earthly romance dissipated. The desires are still there, but only in the context of God’s will – in a God-breathed marriage, made in His time. Cheap make-out sessions and fleeting relationships hold no value to me anymore. I found a love that surpasses all understanding, one that fills me to the brim so nothing else has a space inside me.
I pray you find that love as well. Whatever may be holding you back – temptation, guilt, a longing for something of this world – love Him first, and His awesome goodness will take you over, pursuing you and filling you until you are overflowing with His love. And trust me…with His love, you won’t want anything else.