What Is That to You?
It has been said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” I don’t know who penned those words but I know every woman, young and old, needs to hear and believe that truth, myself included.
I’m not sure when it’s learned or how, but we as girls have a natural tendency to compare, to copy, imitate, and compete. Yes, you would think competition is a male tendency based on centuries of athleticism but if you think back to elementary school, junior high, or high school (ugh . . . ), you’ll see the highlight footage in your mind’s eye. We were often competing against each other for popularity, attention, position, and affection. We dressed, acted, and conformed to peer and social pressure. We didn’t dare carve our own path.
As Christian women, why do we still struggle with comparison? Having been in ministry for a while now, I’m familiar with the struggle of comparing my gifts to those of another—my role, opportunities, callings. And now I’m seeing it in my younger sisters just starting out in ministry, in life.
This is a path that leads to disappointment and truly does steal the joy God intended for us to have by fulfilling our own calling.
In John 21, we find the disciples just finishing a beachside breakfast with Jesus. Nice, peaceful scene, right? Jesus begins to tell Peter of his unique calling, (verses 18–19) a difficult one for sure, but one he was created for, gifted for, and a destiny the Lord would bless. But Peter ponders, looks at John, and asks, “What about him, Lord?”
What about him? Will he also have this destiny? Will his life end the same? Will he get to do things I won’t?
No matter how we phrase our prayers or concerns to the Lord, He sees our heart. And His answer to Peter is His answer to us all, “What is that to you?”
In our lives, our ministry, circle of friends, marriages, and our station in life, we as followers of a holy and loving God know that everything we have comes through His hands and is given to us for His glory.
But, how easy it is to take our eyes off our blessings or gifts and yearn for something else. “Wish I could sing like her. Wish I lived in that house and had her life, her kids, her husband, her look, her metabolism” (no seriously, I’ve wished that last one). And while most of that is our flesh nature, it plants a seed that if left unattended can grow into dissatisfaction and loss of appreciation for what He has designed for you: your gifts, your calling, your path.
We are each uniquely and wonderfully created to be who God designed us to be for His good works and His good purpose. There is no one like you. As the Lord states, we are His masterpiece.
When the Lord reminds us in Jeremiah 29:11 that He has plans for us, it’s to encourage us that there is a life designed and planned specifically for you! A life to bring hope and a future. Your life.
A life filled with coffee stains, cars that won’t start, tears, painful loss, and tempestuous storms, yes—but also a life where He will use your voice, your skills, your talents to point someone to Christ. You have a purpose that Christ has only chosen for you. Don’t miss it!
Need proof? In Hebrews 12:1, God shows us by stating, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us!”
You have your own lane to run in this race, your own track shoes, your own finish line—and it’s clearly marked out for you.
Comparison sticks us on the sidelines in our Christian walk. If we can’t be like her, then why try? “I’m not good enough” is a lie from Satan. You weren’t created to be her, and I guarantee that her life, while seemingly perfect, is full of trials and tests you don’t want and weren’t created for.
Today, I encourage my sisters, young and old, to exercise the gifts you’ve been given, get off the bench, and get in the lineup. Be content with the countless blessings you have been given. Open and use your gifts!
You are His finest work, His sonnet, His beloved. Sing your song, and dance your dance, even if it’s unlike any other. Especially if it’s unlike any other. We, as a body, need you to be you!
Live your life for His glory.
You can choose joy!
16 comments
Connie | August 21, 2015
Sheryl,
Thank you for this! It was perfect! Hope to see you soon
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Shirley evaro | August 21, 2015
Cathe, I want to let you know how I do look forward to reading your emails. I was wondering if you send them daily? I get them once in a while and I don't know if it daily or once a month? You are a blessing a breath of fresh air when I receive your emails. It's like our Father speaks right through you and directly to me! Lol. Praying for you and your ministry. One day I would love to attend one of your women's bible study. I do have a FB and I would be blessed if you could let me know when you meet?
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Diane | August 21, 2015
So much freedom in this message! If I desire a 'personal' relationship with Christ, He will continue to personalize' it...As the desire increases, so does the transformation.
Love this promise ❤️
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Virginia Smith | August 21, 2015
Well said Sheryl. I appreciate those words of admonition and encouragement. We are robbed of the joy and abundant life the Lord has for us. Blessings
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Jenny | August 21, 2015
Thank you...This was much needed! I have sensed this all week! Confirmation....;) God bless.
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Chanele | August 21, 2015
Soo good!! I want to carve my own path for His Glory!!
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Laura | August 21, 2015
Sheryl, you are a blessing in my life. You're so wise and so much fun to be around. I love your transparancy, your heart, and your passionate desire to please our Heavenly Father. Thank you for sharing with us the jewels that you discover from digging deep into the Word and walking closer with our sweet Jesus. Love you!
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Lynne | August 22, 2015
Behaviors, often, have been with us for so long we don't even realize we have them, they certainly can become an unconscious behavior. Our Lord is so sweet, in that, HE will somehow, consciously, make us aware of these, sometimes, self-destructive behaviors so we CAN use our own gifts for HIS glory.
Thank you Cathe for allowing God to speak to me, and I'm sure many other women, through your words.
God Bless you and all women reading this article today. I pray The Lord opens all of our eyes to this behavior as we continue on our road to becoming the Godly women HE intends us to be.
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Mary | August 23, 2015
I fall victim to this "comparison" behavior and have to consciously stop and count my blessings. Thank you for this message and reminder because it is so freeing to sing my own song and dance my own dance!
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Nadine | August 23, 2015
I wish to thank you for bringing to my attention the statement about not being good enough. I will pray to change that thinking about myself. I don't want Satan 's lies to keep me from Jesus.
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Digna Suarez | August 26, 2015
Thank so much. This has been an eye opener. It's so easy for me to compare my self to others. I will look to Jesus who has made me to do His work with the gift He has given me. And be transformed by the renewing of my mind.
Praise God for who I am in Christ.
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Val | August 26, 2015
Thank you for the reminder of this beautiful truth! I know it in my head, but it still needs to move into my heart. My prayer is that all my believing sisters out there would see themselves the way the Lord sees them, and then go out and be used by Him for His glory. And I just loved the words, "sing your song and dance your dance, even if it's unlike any other." Woo-hoo!
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Judy | August 29, 2015
Comparison is thief of joy...I've not quite thought about it that way but it's so true! Thank you for sharing and God bless you!
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Leilani | September 11, 2015
Thank you so much for this! I needed this reminder very much because I've recently let my self slip down into that sideline...
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Kathy Mantei | September 11, 2015
I choose joy! Amen and Amen!
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Lizbett | October 25, 2015
Wow! what a beautiful and powerful message. I am 40 years old and I have always wanted somebody else's life. Just last Wednesday I got sometime to be with my father whom I did not grow up with and with one of my stepsister. She is my father's first born and I could even say she is his favorite. She is just beautiful, confident, smart, well spoken, just perfect. They have a good relationship and he has been in her life all the time. I felt like an outcast that day. I tried my best not to feel that way but I wanted to be her. I didn't think about it at that moment, but I went home that day feeling unease I asked myself why. Today I am reading this article from your website just by chance and this is the message. God knew I needed to hear this. Thank you very much for this website and thank you Abba for your love for me.
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