When it comes to your relationship with God, what do you bring to the table? Are you ready to hear this? Truth is, nothing.

You may ask, “But doesn’t God expect something from me?” The best answer I’ve ever heard to that question came from an old British preacher, Alan Redpath.

In a sermon he preached at Keswick, England in 1963, he said, “God expects nothing from Alan Redpath but failure. He expects nothing from any of us but utter failure. But He has given you the Holy Spirit, that you need never fail.”

How liberating is that? What’s more, God doesn’t need you—but He wants you. He wants you for love’s sake, for your own sake. So, when you come to the table, leave your resumé of achievements, talents and virtues behind.

As Psalm 51:17 puts it, “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.”  Bring your wounds, your doubts, your poverty, and your need. That is all He’s ever asked for.

Your worth to God.

The great Christian philosopher, Francis Schaeffer said, “Our relationship with God is not dependent on the strength of our faith but on the strength of His faithfulness.” Your worth to God is not measured in what you can do for Him. It rests in the truth that He loves you and redeemed you through Christ Jesus.

I’ve been thinking of the tension that we, as women, often feel in our prayers. We want to please God in every way—and we also want a spouse and close group of friends who live up to our own high standards. Picture your “perfect” man or imagine that high-value group of friends you’re after. This would be a better time to ask what you bring to the table.

Have you considered what they are looking for? What sort of person would make their lives better?  Now go and become that person. But be very sure you’re willing to become that person. Let me illustrate.

I have a friend who was in a casual dating relationship that she hoped would become more. So, she made it her aim to be the kind of girl that fit his ideal. Did he like scuba diving? She was terrified of water, but said, “I love scuba diving too!” Skiing? She looked amazing in the outfits, but when it came to facing the mountain, she preferred watching others ski while she sipped hot cocoa in the lodge, safely tucked into a warm booth by the window. She didn’t love either sport and never planned to.  She loved the idea of him loving her. It worked for awhile, pretending she was that girl, but in time it was clear they had little in common.

Authentic and faithful.

Do you long for a spouse or friend who is authentic and faithful? Cultivate authenticity and faithfulness in your own life. Do you want someone kind and generous? Practice kindness and generosity. “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17).

Please hear me in this. While you are busy becoming the person who God has created you to be—interesting, mature, joyful—you will inevitably find yourself stepping outside your comfort zone. And that’s okay because He is faithfully shaping and refining you.

Just remember, your worth rests in His unconditional love for you.

There is no safer, more satisfying place than in being who you are—and who you are becoming—as you, “Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:33).

One of the best ways I know to connect is by serving in the church. Volunteer to be part of the serve team, join a small group, stick around for fellowship after service and get to know people. Wouldn’t you know it, the kind of people who do these things are just the sorts of people you’ve been looking for. Only now, they are looking for you too. Focus on becoming the best version of yourself for God’s glory and He will do the rest.

Come to the table.

Lay aside the baubles this world claims make you special. The latest outfit and hairstyle. The talents, the discerning taste, the glittering displays of wit—yes, even that charming smile you’ve been fashioning all these years to project success.

Offer your whole heart, brokenness and all, to the One who loves and knows you better than you know yourself. “Take delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4).

Be the person God is shaping you to be, all in for Him. Because when you show up with nothing but your need and your willingness, you will find that God has already set the table for you.