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Boys are adventurous, they are curious, they are dirty and grimy and oftentimes stinky. If your son is like mine, he brushes his teeth and showers only when he is reminded. Or if you have a pool, a daily dunk might even suffice through the long days of summer. Is it ideal? No. Are they going to die? Probably not. In fact, this method of boy hygiene might even help keep the girls away . . . bonus!

 

Every so often, my teenage son says, “Hey mom, watch this . . . ” or “Hey mom, do you think I can . . . ” (insert something a little more daring than I’m comfortable with). On the rare occasion when he asks permission beforehand, I try to consider these guidelines:

 

  • Boys inevitably get hurt (let’s just say Urgent Care knows us), but can someone else get hurt?
  • Will it damage someone’s property (besides our own)?
  • Will it cause him or someone else to fall into sin or get in trouble?

 

If the answer is no, he’ll most likely get a green light. To be honest, I’m curious about what he’s building or experimenting with. He’s a smart boy, he weighs the consequences, and he usually understands the risks versus the outcome. So I (usually) set my nervous feelings aside and let the boy create.

 

It’s my opinion that boys need to be boys. They need to build and explore. They need to run and ride bikes. They need to climb trees and swing on ropes. They need to launch things and catch things. They need to build things and take things apart. And in doing these things . . . wait for it . . . they might get hurt. When that happens, they might fix it themselves with electrical tape because getting stitches just takes too much time—I know this to be true.

 

If your boy is like mine, he might sleep in a hammock rather than the new bedroom set you just bought. Because that’s what boys do.

 

He might attach a rocket engine to a skateboard just to see how far and fast it will take him (helmet required of course). Because that’s what boys do.

 

He might show you something he learned in science with baking soda, a torch, and PVC pipe which results in the biggest fireball your neighborhood has ever seen (welding mask and gloves required of course). Because that’s what boys do.

 

I don’t want to hold my boy back. I never want his curiosity and sense of adventure to be squashed because of my motherly nerves, which seem to intensify with every passing year. I want to let him be a boy, curious and adventurous.

 

Psalm 127:4 says, “Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth” (NKJV). My son is an arrow. Whether I like it or not, he’s going to be launched into this great big (scary!) world. He’s going to go places and do things. He’s going to go where I am unable to go and do things I’m unable to do because God has a special call on his life. As a mom, that’s a hard pill to swallow. But am I doing what I can to prepare him? Am I holding him back? I have to daily ask myself, “Am I willing to let go so he can experience and grow?”

 

I have learned that when I put my maternal fears aside and pray, exciting things happen in his life. He was thrilled at 12 years old to be given the opportunity to go to Haiti. Yes, he may have “misplaced” his toothbrush, but he also got to build a 10×12 house for a woman and her six children. He went back the next year and converted a box truck into a passenger vehicle (he showered only once, outside, in the rain). The following year he spent his days building an irrigation system for the locals and slept the entire trip in his hammock on the roof. And guess what? Each time, he came home smiling, he was changed, he had the opportunity to make a difference in peoples’ lives and experience the presence of Jesus like never before!

 

He’s my arrow. One day he will launch out into this great big world. Until that day, my job is to nurture and shape him, hold on, and let go, as God reveals His good plan for my little buddyman’s life.