The Dependable Mother

What is a mother’s job? We are to love our children, discipline them, and teach them.

Titus 2:4 tells us that the older woman is to instruct the younger woman to love their children.

The Greek word for love in this passage is not found anywhere else in Scripture. Phileoleknos is the word used and it describes a mother’s love—caring for her children, preferring them, affectionately embracing them, and tenderly befriending each one as unique from the hand of God.

In Proverbs 31:15, it says, "She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household and a portion for her maid servants" (NKJV).

This woman wasn’t lazy. She got up early to organize and prepare for the day. And just like her, we need to rise early to meet with the Lord to prepare us for the day ahead. He feeds us, so we can feed our children.

My own Mom and my mother-in-law set a wonderful example for their children, rising at 5:00 A.M. each day to pray for them.

Later, in verse 18, we read: "She perceives that her merchandise is good and her lamp does not go out by night" (NKJV).

The virtuous woman was not careless with her merchandise, but looked it over. She shopped intelligently and wasn’t an impulsive buyer.

Her lamp stayed lit because she made sure it kept going all night. It would be easy to use the lamp to light the kitchen stove in the morning so she could make breakfast. She had to keep oil in it, getting up at night to do so.

So how do we apply this to our lives today?

We are the light of the world. When we are awake in the night, it’s wonderful to spend that time in prayer for the children, so that the light of Jesus in our lives might ignite their fire.

When our son hit college, he went through a growing phase. One evening, he saw his dad out walking the streets in our neighborhood. He asked me what his dad was doing, and I told him that he was praying for him. I told him that no one loved him in this whole world as much as we did, except Jesus.

He left home and came back three different times until he was really ready to go out on his own. Love keeps them coming home.

I learned this unconditional love first-hand from my parents. When I was 14, they sent me to a Christian boarding school in Orlando, Florida—3,000 miles away. They told me how much they loved me and that I knew I could always come home.

That knowledge kept me secure and able to go away for the next four years. I learned that God was there with me and that He would never leave me nor forsake me.

I rubbed shoulders with many missionary kids, pastors’ kids and even Billy Graham’s kids. I learned about faith and trusting God for everything. My parents loved me enough to do what they thought was best for me, not what was best for them. They sacrificed for me.

Verse 27 says, "She watches over the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness" (NKJV). In other words, she worked hard and thought of her family first.

Brenda, my daughter-in-law with the five kids, loves to cook for her family and her boys love it too. They say they get to eat at mom’s restaurant three times a day!

Another role for the dependable mother is to discipline. A mom is responsible to correct her children when they have been wrong. Revelation 3:19 says, "As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten. Therefore be zealous and repent" (NKJV).

Remember, it’s never good to criticize a child, but it is good to correct them. A well-behaved child is a joy to be around. Discipline should lead to repentance. We’re not to do it in anger, but we are to do it.

The dependable mother also needs to teach the children. Someone has said, "Parents spend the first two years teaching their child to walk and talk, and the next 18 years telling them to sit down and be quiet!"

Scripture tells us this: "You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. (Deuteronomy 6:5-7 NKJV)

Teach your children the way of salvation and how to have a living, loving relationship with Christ. Have devotions with them that are age-appropriate.

My middle son teaches his boys about the Lord and tells them that Buzz Lightyear just got born again. Lead them to Christ at an early age.

Remember, the children will grow up and leave you someday. But the Lord will never leave them.