Being Single
What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear the word single? Loneliness, excitement, anxiousness, peacefulness, bitterness, privileged?
For me, it has been all of those things, at one point or another.
While thinking about my own life, I really wanted to seek out what the Word of God had to say about living the single life. I was blown away by the weight of what I found.
Contentment lays the groundwork. In Philippians 4:11–12, the apostle Paul talks about his learned ability to be content in all circumstances: “Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content.”
I think it is important to note that Paul was in prison when he wrote this, chained 24 hours a day to a Roman guard. He remained content by God’s grace.
I am not saying that being single is anything like being “chained to a Roman guard for 24 hours a day,” but I know that if Paul could be content in that situation, we can be content as single women in love with Jesus Christ!
Contentment is defined as “being satisfied with what one is or has and not wanting more or anything else.” By that definition, are you content?
Pastor James McDonald says that contentment means, “When I have much, I will praise Him. When I have little or nothing, I will still praise Him.” That, to me, is contentment!
Now I know that there are times and seasons in life where being single is more OK than others. For example, maybe you, like me, have three Save the Date announcements on your fridge. Every paycheck is a down payment on a bridesmaid dress. Weekends are spent tying Raffia bows to wedding announcements. Your friends’ blogs are filled with engagement photos. Episodes of Rich Bride Poor Bride and Glamorous Wedding are on constant repeat on your TV.
But, with all that being said, we can be content exactly where God has us right now!
How? By doing three things:
- Taking heed of God’s promises.
- Believing God is who He says He is.
- Understanding our purpose.
Paul, in 2 Corinthians 1:20, says “For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us.” I encourage you to seek out the promises of God and allow them to be a covering over your life. There are endless promises from our heavenly Father that will bring about contentment in your life, as soon as now!
In order to know who God is, we must know who He says He is. He is your Mighty Creator, your Almighty God, your Provider, your Peace, and your Banner. He is your Healer and your Shepherd. He is your Dwelling Place, your Refuge, your Shield, your Fortress, and your Strong Tower. And He is your husband. That is who God says He is.
Do you believe that today?
And lastly, understanding our purpose. Someone once said, “Our destiny, our greatest purpose as God’s people, is to become His bride” I love that!
One day, we will meet Him face-to-face as we are seated as the bride of Christ at the marriage supper of the Lamb. How beautiful and exciting!
In Isaiah 43:7, the Lord says “Everyone who is called by My name, Whom I have created for My glory; I have formed him, yes, I have made him.”
We were created with a purpose, to glorify God in all we do. Your desire may be to one day be married to the man who the Lord has for you, and the Lord knows your desire. Trust in who He says He is, believe the promises He makes, and fulfill your purpose to glorify Him. You will learn to be content right where the Lord has you!
So, for now, “do not grow weary in doing for in due season you will reap a harvest if you do not grow weary” and “seek first His kingdom and all things shall be added unto you”!
13 comments
Lisa | January 21, 2010
I love this article! What a great perspective. I will be sharing this with many single women AND men!
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Jamie | January 21, 2010
Great article, Tiffany. Thank you. I am new to being single as I was widowed in 2009, and I appreciate the help with this new perspective of life. My promise is Isaiah 54:5. My Maker is my husband now. I hold tightly to that promise in this very confusing time. I was blessed to read your article today. God bless you.
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Michelle | January 21, 2010
I have experienced what it is to wait on the Lord. Truly I am still waiting, but I find my hope in my Lord, my God, the Lover of my soul who will never leave me or forsake me. I can take all my troubles and cast them on Him. I find particular comfort in verses such as Philippians 4:6-7 and Proverbs 3:5-6. Most of the time I don't understand what the Lord is working out in my life. It is often not until He has seen me through hard situations that I can look back and thank the Lord that He is in control and has a much bigger and better plan for my life than I do. Sometimes I am better at trusting Him than other times, but I find that when I do have trouble, seeking God in prayer and through His word always brings me back to resting in His promises for my life as I am found in His love. Thanks so much for this article, it has been an encouragement to me.
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Lindsey | January 21, 2010
Thank You!
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Dianne | January 24, 2010
Good article Tiff
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TAYLER | January 26, 2010
Great job sis! I know this article has, and will minister to a lot of women!
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Susana | February 2, 2010
Thanks for the article...now in days being a single mother and trying to live a Christian life is so difficult. I have put my trust in the Lord and I believe He has something good for me and my children. Thanks once again.
Jeanette | February 3, 2010
Sweet Susana, God's Word has so many promises that will carry you through the tough times of single motherhood. How awesome it is that you are trusting in the LORD for you and your children!
Jamie referenced Isaiah 54:5 "For your Maker is your husband, the LORD of hosts is His name; and your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel; He is called the God of the whole earth." This is truly a precious promise for each one of us, and as a single mom, you will find another precious promise further on in that same chapter, Isaiah 54:13-14 "All your children shall be taught by the LORD, and great shall be the peace of your children. In righteousness you shall be established; you shall be far from oppression, for you shall not fear; and from terror, for it shall not come near you."
The 3 things Tiffany encourages us to do can apply to every aspect of our walk with the LORD. Thank you both for honestly sharing your hearts!
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Marlene | February 3, 2010
Tiffany, This is a wonderful article and so beautifully written. What an encouragement for so many. God is certainly using you in mighty ways!!!
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diane | February 10, 2010
Tiffany, thank you so much! Being an older (46) single mom, your post is a reflection and a reminder of how I want/try to live my life every day. The promise of God I lean on a lot is that God is faithful, He knows what He's doing and He knows us better than we know ourselves.
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Marlene | February 25, 2010
I am a single mother also. Thanks for this post and the other women's replies. I understand that verse by Paul that tells us to be content in every state. I believe in that, but I really want to learn what God's purpose in my life is!! I was laid off in October and now am home with my daughter, which is good, but I need to find that purpose God has for me!
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Aretha | March 7, 2010
Thank you so kindly for this article! I sometimes feel that I am the only woman who feels this way. I constantly pray for God to send me a husband. I am a 53 year old woman who has never been married. I so desperately want to marry a God fearing man of God"s choosing. I realize that things happen in God's time and not my time. I also realize that I must deny myself of some carnal pleasures in order for God to give me the desires of my heart. I pray that God continues to search my heart and remove anything that is not like him. Glory be to God in the HIGHEST!
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Melanie | July 22, 2012
I loved this article, but I wish that there were articles that discussed singleness for women as something that is desirable. Even Paul says it's better to be single, but as a 50 year old single woman (no children), the constant message that I am bombarded with in the body of Christ is that I *need* to be married, that I should want a husband. I'm open to what the Lord has for me, but I am VERY content in my singleness.
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Melanie | July 22, 2012
As an afterthought just to give an example, I was reading You Tube comments and a woman was very harshly rebuking other women for wanting to be single, blaming them for men's lust etc. I know this isn't biblical, and the person writing may be an exception, but this isn't *too* far from what women have to deal with in the body regarding singleness and being happy as a single woman.
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