A New Way to Be Human
Reality TV takes “people-watching” to another level. Shows like Shark Tank and Survivor score high ratings. American Idol recently went out big with 13 million people watching to see who would be the next (and last) American Idol. What makes these shows so popular? We like to think we’re getting an unscripted, behind-the-scenes glimpse of how a person acts and thinks. When television does this, it’s for salacious effect, but when the Bible pulls back the curtain to reveal the heart and inmost thoughts of Jesus, it’s so we might be transformed.
That’s the goal, really, of studying God’s Word. Not just to have correct information about the incarnation of Jesus in our heads, as important as that is, but so that it will take root in us. When we see the love behind His willingness to come live as a man and serve in a fallen world, it goes deep and changes how we think and live.
We see Jesus washing the disciples’ feet on the night before He would die (John 13). This was the lowest of all jobs. Even a Jewish slave could not be forced to wash feet, but Jesus gets down on His knees and serves them. Why? To show them (and us) a new way to be human.
“I’m giving you a new commandment. Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other” (John 13:34 NLT).
Philippians 2:3–8 shows us the heart and mind of Jesus behind this command. It shows how to take this word love and practice it—not the way culture tells us to love but the way Jesus showed us how to love.
Social media makes it easier than ever to “friend” someone or find someone compatible to fall in love with. But it’s never been harder to stay in love or stay in close friendships. Every relationship has hard times, hurting times, times when it will cost you.
What are we willing to do to maintain love? Are we willing to go the extra mile? Or how long will it be until we say, “Whatever! I’m done. I’m outta here.” It’s so easy to walk away and wash our hands of that situation . . . that person . . . that group . . . that church. But the Bible says, “Better is the end of a thing than its beginning, and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit” (Ecclesiastes 7:8 ESV). It is worth sticking it out; it is worth not throwing in the towel.
Something in each of us yearns for meaningful, committed relationships. Despite the divorce rates, quarrels with friends, or church splits, we want bonds of love that will last.
We look at culture, even our own family history, and wonder if it’s possible to stick together for a lifetime. I don’t mean just tolerating one another or quietly coexisting. My grandparents lived together all their lives. She had her garden club, and he had his crossword puzzles, but barely a conversation passed between them. When I said, “I do,” my goal was not just to stay together, but to stay in love forever.
When Greg and I fell in love, he was funny, cute, and super-focused on Jesus. But we were opposite in many ways and we had our quarrels about many things. We soon discovered that staying in love takes work! The secret is to practice love habitually, intentionally, sacrificially. But selfless love doesn’t come naturally.
That’s why Paul wrote to his dear friends, the Philippians. They were a healthy, loving church—maybe his favorite! But even the most devoted people go through times when it’s difficult to love each other. It won’t be enough to fall back on feelings; we’re going to need a stronger motivation to rekindle love, mend a friendship, save a marriage.
For love to work, we need to see the way Jesus loves and take our cues from Him. “In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus” (Philippians 2:5 NIV).
Jesus humbled Himself. I love the phrase “He emptied Himself.” What a contrast! We’re so full of ourselves, but Jesus chose to place our need for forgiveness above His own glory.
Treat others as more important. You may think, “But they’re not more important!” That’s not the issue. Paul says, treat them as if they are more important. It’s really a matter of respect. We’re drawn to people who treat us as someone special, aren’t we? We may not even realize why we lean their way; we just know they’ve shown us love.
When we choose to show respect, it brings into our relationships a degree of love that is missing without it. Everywhere Jesus went, He really was the most important person, but He never leveraged that to His advantage.
Look out for one another’s interests. “Look” implies showing interest in what matters to someone else—even in things we don’t necessarily find interesting. I’ve noticed, in the healthy relationships and marriages of people I’ve observed and respected for many years, there is this aspect to their life. They have a habit of expressing genuine interest in other people.
In 42 years of marriage, I’ve seen Greg take an interest in what interests me. Trouble is, my interests keep changing! But he’s shown an interest in every phase. For me, it’s been easier. Greg still loves old cars, loud motorcycles, and action movies. I don’t always like to ride on the back of a motorcycle or watch war movies, but I’m trying! I want to care about old cars because he likes them and it’s an opportunity for me to show him that I love him.
The question for us is, are we willing to take these things out of our Bibles and put them into practice? Do we think it’s beneath us? God in heaven is interested in every detail of your life.
Jesus emptied Himself to serve and to die a shameful death. Why? Because He chose a relationship with us over His own glory. His love is the most transforming force in the universe. When we bow in love and serve one another, His love takes root and grows in us.
Jesus said, “Love each other as I have loved you.”
Let’s start in new relationships just beginning.
Let’s start in marriages that span decades.
Let’s start in hard places where friendships hang by a thread.
Let’s put away the snubs and slights.
Let’s be the first one to put out a hand and say, “Let’s make it right.”
22 comments
Kathy Laneaux | May 18, 2016
Beautifully stated. Definitely to take into consideration. Being in the hospitality industry, this is surely an area where everyone can take some lessons. If only the owners or GM's would see it from our point of view when we try to go that little extra mile.
Thank you and God Bless.
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LeGlensa M. | May 18, 2016
Scrolling through my emails and stopped to read this. Always read your husband's but never yours. I know it was the Spirit that lead me to it! Busy day at work and co-workers are out of control. I needed to hear this to help me put things in perspective! Thank you soooo much for the honesty and most of all the truth. God Is Love! I continue to strive to be that person that JESUS would have me be!
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Susie Davenport | May 18, 2016
Ouch Cathie! This hit me right where I live. The Lord had been dealing with me on this issue. I have a long time friendship that is now hanging by a thread. The Lord has been asking me to love this person despite all that they have done. Not only is this person a friend but our children married each other and now we are family. What I thought would be joyful has been difficult as I see things through a different lens. But I want more than anything to be who Jesus wants me to be so I am going to love and forgive and accept the things that are done yet seem wrong to me. I want to persevere. I want the end to be better than the beginning. I want the Lord to make something beautiful out of it. I want grace to be what I am about. Thank you for posting this. I love reading your emails.
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Mindi Pettit | May 18, 2016
Thank you -- He really was the most important and didn't leverage it. Oh, to be like Him. Beautiful.
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Veronica Vazquez | May 18, 2016
Blessed thought...thank you. It's always refreshing to know God's will for our lives and those in our midst. To put our loved ones, friends, even those who don't like us (enemies) God will be glorified.
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Miguel & Veronica | May 18, 2016
Hi Cathe just wanted to say that your letter was ministering to me today. May the Lord continue to bless you and your family...Keep fighting the good fight.
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michele f. | May 19, 2016
Dearest Cathe...what an amazing devotional time I have had this morning reading this and gleaning so much wisdom from your words...and from God's...
We truly need daily reminders of what it looks like to BE LOVE. Christ calls us to that simple task--that truly is one of the most difficult to accomplish in our lives...but...if we allow His Word to take 'root' in our day to day living--we can do it :) He says so...He gives us what we need to do it--we just need to put it into action. Thanks for the reminder to BE LOVE--at all times--in all circumstances--BE HUMBLE---SHOW RESPECT--OTHERS BEFORE SELF---so so simple---yet so hard :) May God give us the strength and wisdom to see where we need to step up and take action with those we love and with those we touch daily. May His Word take root in our hearts...Let them see Jesus--thru us--Amen :)
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Jeri | May 19, 2016
Getting ready to read my morning devotion, I wanted to check my emails first. I scrolled down and your words touched my heart. The Lord spoke to me through your message this morning in regards to my husband. We have been having a real tough time lately. Thank you for the word the Lord put on your heart this morning.
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Ailsa | May 19, 2016
Just the words I needed to read. In my relationship, with my children and with my vicar/ pastor who seems to struggle, I'm going to pray for more of thus Jesus type sacrificial love in me!! When it's given through Jesus' power and not your own its not too difficult!! Thank you x
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jodi p. | May 19, 2016
Cathe, you are so eloquent, relevant, real. I love your wisdom, insight and the beautiful way you have of revealing the truth in God's word. I so look forward to your emails, each one is filled with the voice of a seasoned woman of faith and all the treasures of your soul that you lay bare to inspire, teach, remind and affirm us. You talk of love this time. The love of God so pure, humble and strong. Thank you for sharing His love and yours with us...you are a precious diamond. May He love, bless and keep you!
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Maria Edgley | May 19, 2016
Thank you for this powerful reminder. I am constantly amazed at the incomprehensible degree of love that our Jesus has for us and showed us while he was here on earth. You stated this in 'He emptied Himself to serve us.... Jesus chose to place our need for forgiveness above His own glory." We need to take His example of unconditional love and show it to everyone we come in contact with every day and especially our families.
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Monica | May 19, 2016
Thank you Cathe, I'm trying too. My husband and I are very different but that's a good thing. After 31 yrs we are still trying to figure each other out, but I keep changing...at least he stays the same. Thanks for the blessing of reading this good stuff for me to think about.
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Debbie Zamora | May 19, 2016
Hi Cathe, it's good to hear from you. Thank you so much for the reminder to love. I took a bible class and learned lots of scriptures. One of them was Matthew 22:37-39. I Love Jesus very much and my family very much; these high managers at work ah.............. Thank you for reminding me I will need to smile at them and be nice to them and love them. I will remember they are made in God's image. My Jesus humbled himself, He emptied Himself. This really has taught me something. My Jesus emptied himself and I need to empty myself and not be full of me. Thank You God for sending Jesus who chose to place our need for forgiveness above His own glory. This is beautiful and has taught me a lot.
Have a great weekend! God's Richest Blessings to you!
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Debbie Zamora | May 19, 2016
Thank you for sending! Jesus chose to place our need for forgiveness above His own glory. This is beautiful!
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Gabriella | May 19, 2016
Thank you for this Cathie. It will be 20yrs this October being married to my husband. We did have a little rough patch recently but are working it out. Communication is the one thing we were starting to lack. Our kids are older now and we are trying to make more time together as a couple. It was hard with his graveyard shift. Thankfully he won't have that for awhile. Marriage does require work and sacrifices this generation doesn't realize till its too late. Thank you for this reading Cathie, you are a great role model.
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Nanci | May 20, 2016
Well said and just the wisdom I need to hear. As my husband was about to retire last fall, I learned his dream was to buy an RV and travel around the western continent fly fishing, hiking, etc. As I have never been a camper, I have had to learn new things. We also have different likes and dislikes but there are still the things that are common among us, as was in the beginning. This chapter is a new beginning in our lives and I loved to hear "The end of a thing is better than its beginning; the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit."
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Renata | May 20, 2016
At one point in my life, I thought I knew how to love. Unfortunately, I have been hurt severely over the past 25 years and have built up walls that need to be torn down. I have been asking God to tear those walls down and teach me how to love again. He seems to be doing it bit by bit but I still find it difficult to love like I should.
Thanks for the reminder of what love is, how important it is and for all that you do in Jesus Name.
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Grayce Teves | May 20, 2016
Thank You Cathy. I really needed to read this and apply it to my own life. Jesus is so wonderful and beautiful.
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Nancy | May 21, 2016
Thanks for those words of wisdom, Cathe. I am definitely saving this and keeping it for future use! Love your heart for Jesus!
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Susan | May 24, 2016
No coincidence for me either. Needed this today! Thank you!
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Donna | June 4, 2016
Cathe, Thank you for sharing! You are an inspiration to me! I am going to share this with my friends and family as well! I have been following for a short time and love your sweet spirit and the way God uses you! God bless!
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annie | June 5, 2016
Thank you for this. : )
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